Adopting a Large Family Mentality When You Are a Small Family

In my large family birthdays post, I alluded to the fact that we adopted a large family mentality long before we were a large family.  That fact alone, revolutionized our home life.  Ever since then, I’ve found it important to tell other families how acting like a large family even when they are not can make a tremendous difference in their lives.

Why I adopted a large family mentality:
It happened simply because I began to desire a large family.  Because of this desire, I began frequenting large family sites on the internet and the real-life homes of people who had large families.  I observed.  I asked questions.  I mimicked.

What happened when I adopted a large family mentality?:
My husband was deployed at the time, so the most obvious difference was that my day was much more streamlined and easier to manage.  The second thing I noticed was that my children were happier.  I also realized I was more content as well.

Where did I start?:
I started with a Bath Routine.  It was a simple place to start and easy to implement.  I’ve been using the same bathing schedule for 8 years now!

What types of large family things can a small family implement?:
Just about anything!  I’d encourage your to peruse the Large Family Living section of this blog, and also consider these things…

  • Share bedrooms
    Large families do this because they have to, but it builds such camaraderie between siblings, I suggest it to everyone.
  • Color Code
    I shared on Wednesday how we color code our children.  This is something that will build efficiency in any size household.
  • Give the Children Chores
    Require work from them.  This builds responsibility and character and teaches them that a household is held together by the entire family and not just one person.
  • See Them as Blessings
    It is nearly impossible to accept God’s leading in your family size and not see your children as blessings.  Start enjoying them for who God made them to be.  Revel in their crooked smiles and open-mouthed kisses.  See them as God sees them…not as something you must do for the next 18 years, but as someone you’ve been blessed with for an eternity.  When God says they are a reward, believe Him!
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14 Responses to Adopting a Large Family Mentality When You Are a Small Family
  1. Stephanie Hanes
    May 13, 2010 | 6:25 pm

    Thank you SO much for this advice! We are just beginning to develop a Large Family mentality and this is just the encouragement I needed. We’re excited to watch our family grow with as many blessings as the Lord desires for our family.

  2. Michelle
    May 13, 2010 | 6:58 pm

    Such a great post! We only have three children, but sometimes I get to thinking how I would order my day if I had 7!I wanted 7 children, actually) I love big families with lots of children and I think we could all learn much wisdom from those that have them!

  3. Muthering Heights
    May 13, 2010 | 8:56 pm

    Hi Amy!

    I’ve been lurking around here for quite a while now…and I’d just like to say that yours in one of my new favorite blogs!! :)

    • Amy
      May 13, 2010 | 10:42 pm

      Thanks so much! (and I love it when lurkers come out of the shadows! ;) )

  4. Tanya - Lilyofthevalley
    May 13, 2010 | 9:30 pm

    I’ve been reading here, just haven’t taken the time to comment! I enjoy your blog!! :)
    Tanya – Lilyofthevalley´s last blog ..Horse Treats My ComLuv Profile

  5. Mama Mirage
    May 13, 2010 | 10:45 pm

    My mom only had 3 of us but she did many things as though we were a much larger family because we were very poor and she was very sick and bedridden for a good part of my childhood. I think as a result, I have automatically done some things “large-family-style” because I grew up that way and know firsthand how well it works. I’ve always hoped to be blessed with a large family but my husband doesn’t see things quite the same way. “We” are planning for 4 kids and #3 is due in September. So our family won’t really be ‘small’ with 4 kids, but I joyfully soak in the amazingness of my children and wonder if my heart wouldn’t always long for ‘just one more’ even if I had 14 kids…
    Mama Mirage´s last blog ..The solution is… – Toddler Tales Tuesday My ComLuv Profile

  6. Virginia Lee
    May 14, 2010 | 10:28 am

    Thank you for all of the shopping, meal lists and grocery list posts. We were just discussing once a month shopping and how to make that happen.

    Baby # 3 is on the way. The once a week thing is not working so great anymore. =)

    You have a wonderful blog by the way.
    Virginia Lee´s last blog ..Calendar Craziness and To Remember My ComLuv Profile

    • Amy
      May 14, 2010 | 10:45 am

      Thanks so much! The more children you have the easier it is to just stay home and streamline because a “want to” becomes a “need to”. Congratulations on your #3! :)

  7. Grace Wheeler
    May 14, 2010 | 2:18 pm

    This is SO me…a momma of a smaller family but with a big family mentality!

    So Amy how does it feel to be on the other end? With “hopefuls” like me observing, asking questions and mimicking YOU?!

    I’m soooo thankful for you, your MOMYS posts and your blog!!!!!
    Grace Wheeler´s last blog ..How We Used To Do Chores–Chore Cards My ComLuv Profile

    • Amy
      May 14, 2010 | 10:46 pm

      You know, I still feel like a small family even though we are now the size of the families I was looking to for information! There is still so much I can glean from families bigger than my own. I’m honored that smaller families want to mimic what we do, but I also know I will never feel as though I have “arrived.” lol

  8. Lauree
    May 14, 2010 | 9:49 pm

    Loved this post. We have 3 kiddos through adoption and our 2 girls share a room. One is 8 months, the other is 3 years. I love listening to them “chat” with each other when they go to bed. People keep asking if we’re going to buy a house with more bedrooms and I say, “no, I like that they share a room.” Would love to adopt another boy and then they could share a room. :)

  9. Beth
    May 15, 2010 | 8:37 am

    Haha, have you been spying on me? Love this post, its exactly what I do it makes life so much better! I have 2 kids, but hoping for many more!

  10. Liz
    May 17, 2010 | 5:44 pm

    I now have four children and I am definitely finding that I need a large family mentality with four, even though I don’t consider four to be a large family!

    Thankfully life isn’t quite so full on as it is with a truly large family as I am just not “up to” keeping on top of it with wonderful efficiency yet. Something I hope I am growing into.
    Liz´s last blog ..Please hold… My ComLuv Profile

  11. Becky
    August 3, 2010 | 6:47 pm

    well spoken

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