Top Ten Reasons To Have a Large Family

In this day and age, having a large family is often equated with either irresponsibility or a lack of concern for the environment–both of which are nowhere near the truth.  Having a large family also seems to invite comments…not all of them kind or even rational.  The rude comment of, “Don’t you know what causes that?” makes me want to scream..it makes my husband nod and smile.

Just the other night, we took an excursion to the grocery store…all of us.  My husband is zipping up and down the aisles with the children strapped into those car carts I won’t ever let them ride in when it’s just me, while childless bystanders count heads over and over, trying to figure out just how many of us there are.

Finally, one of them, a young woman in her early 20’s, has the courage to speak to our crazy bunch.  She says to me,

“You sure have your hands full.”

Never heard that one before, but she said it good-naturedly, so I don’t mind.  And then she follows it up with,

“But you sure look like you have a lot of fun!”

Now, you’re talkin’!

So, without further ado, I bring you my top ten reasons for having a large family, with her comment as…

#1 – They sure are fun! We have a blast together!  In fact, many years ago that was what drew me to large families.  They always looked like they were having a great time together.  Now, I know that isn’t always the case, but in our family fun just comes with the territory.

#2 – 5 (or 6 or 10) is easier than 2. I often hear, “I can’t handle my two children, I don’t know how you do it.”  Honestly, I didn’t handle my two very well either.  I was exhausted, short-fused, and outnumbered.  But, they grow up!  They aren’t all in diapers all the time.  They aren’t all house-wrecking toddlers all at the same time.  If you are diligent to train them with love and discipline, they grow up into lovely “big kids.”  Which leads me to…

#3 – Many hands make light work. I have a lot of helpers now.  I’m not left to do everything by myself all day long.  I have a 12 year old who could single-handedly run this household if need be, and a 9 year old fast on his heels.  The 4 and 5 year olds are learning and the 16 month old isn’t going to be 16 months forever.  They grow up and take on more responsibility, and there is such a blessing to working alongside a “big kid”!

#4 – There’s always enough people to play a game. Whether it is basketball or football or a board game, there’s many available bodies.

#5 – If you’re bored, it’s  your own fault. Need I say more?

#6 – You get a lot of attention. Who needs paparazzi?  Unload a slew of kiddos out of a 15 passenger van and see how many stares your attract.

#7 – Filling out paperwork is always interesting. Whether it’s medical forms or tax forms, I get a kick out of always needing to add spaces in order to get all my children’s information listed.

#8 – I never run out of big plastic hospital cups or baby lotion. Frequent trips to the maternity ward keep me stocked up.

#9 – Meals are always full of lively, entertaining conversation. Never a dull moment and never a word edgewise.

#10 – The Bible calls them blessings.

And they are.

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131 thoughts on “Top Ten Reasons To Have a Large Family

  1. I get the “you have your hands full” comment all the time and I just have three boys. Since having over 2 kids goes against the norm, people feel the need to comment. I once was in the grocery store waiting on prescriptions with all the boys. My older two were in the front part of the cart and the baby was in his carrier in the basket. A woman made that “boy you sure have your hands full” comment. Then the baby cooed and she said, “OH MY WORD! There’s another one in there! You DO know there are things you can do to stop children from coming?!?” I was speechless. There were so many snarky things running through my mind, but I just smiled and laughed it off while fuming inside.
    .-= Mandy@ …life’s about a dream´s last blog ..Laughter Cures All =-.

    • I get that comment alot too with only three. I always give a huge smile and reply w/ “Yes, but there’s absolutely no better way to have them full :)

  2. Love this. I am due with #7 any day now. I agree with all your reasons! And yes, my hubby nods and smiles too. And to my horror, sometimes winks. :)

      • Husbands are always good at responding to that. People have stopped asking us that question (I’m expecting #13), but he has his standard “Of course we do! Why do you think we have so many kid?” usually followed up by “Everyone’s gotta’ be good at SOMEthing.”

        • Don’t worry, I have 5children ranging from 5 to 21 and I was not good w/ pregnancy (gestational diabetes, heart-burn,etc…), delivery (5 c-sections), post-pregnancy (major infection -1st birth)…but I did have one miscarriage and I will always take the alternative of a pregnancy resulting in a live birth!!!!!!! There are so many others who would too!

  3. It ticks me off that people think they have to comment on people who have more than 2 kids. It’s insane. I just have 1 but would like to have several more. Why? Because I think kids in big families learn how to get along with others, unlike the children we’re breeding in this society.

    I’d like to have 4 or even more but my qualm is I am not a very good pregnant person…
    .-= Vanderbilt Wife´s last blog ..Saturday Linky Love =-.

    • I’m not a very good pregnant person either…sick the entire 9 months (including hospitalization from dehydration due to excessive uncontrollable vomiting) Can you tell I STILL don’t cherish the pregnancy? But….the 9 months is A LOT shorter than the many many years of joy they bring you. Just go for it! You’ll get through it and never regret it :)

  4. Love this post! I only have 2 boys, 2 years and 3 months and even I get the comments. Not only is our culture brainwashed into thinking 2 is more than enough but that they should all be girls or girly boys anyways. = ) I am looking forward to having a big family!

    • You know, I don’t think my kids hear the remarks either…except when someone directs the comment at them, like the waitress at Applebees who asked my kids if they were tired of all the babies! ACK!

      • I can’t believe she would ask the kids that! My sons definately overhear things…they tell me we have “a lot of boys”. We only have 4!

  5. Love this! As you might remember, I’m pregnant with #2, who is due around my son’s 2nd birthday.

    I’m preparing to hear the “You’ve got your hands full” comments because…for sure yes they will be full!

    But I also am SO excited to see my son as a big brother. He is such a joy and I hope that he and his sibling will be life-long friends.
    .-= Kacie´s last blog ..Getting back on track with our savings =-.

  6. This is one of the best posts I’ve read today, by far! #3 made me laugh. Growing up I would tell my mom that I was going to have a house full of kids so they could each do one chore…one to take out the trash, one to do the dishes, etc. :-)
    .-= Christine (iDreamofClean)´s last blog ..Nashville 2010 Flood =-.

  7. You have such a beautiful family and a great attitude! I believe God creates some people to be good moms to large families and some to be good moms to small families. You definitely have the gift!

  8. I am the oldest of nine and I remember people at church even asking ME if my parents knew what caused that and if we didn’t have tv or something.
    Now I have 3 little ones (so far) of my own and get the your hands are full comment ALL the time. I have started replying with “better full than empty” Its the only nice thing I can think of to say so I have to have an answer ready beforehand so my mouth doesn’t run away with me! :)

    • I’m with you on that one, we have 3 and one on the way, I hear that all the time, sometimes I think the comment comes from jealousy other times from admiration and the one that gets me mad – from dislike or hate for larger families. But what ever the cause I just hope that I can be gracious and forgiving, and yes I have said “better full than empty” too.

  9. I get the “wow you sure have your hands full” comment ALL THE TIME. What exactly does that mean? Do you think my kids are out of control? Do i look like I have more than I can handle? I hardly no how to answer them. And I know it look sworse, becuase I am so stinking hugely pregnant right now, that I am sure I can even make walking look hard.
    Luckily my kids are friendly and that usually throws people off balance.

    • Omg I have to respond to this. I have gotten comments from people saying “your 3 have totally reset how I pictured kids to be. Yours are incredibly kind. I love this.”

      The last time we went to a restaurant, my 6yo started serving us all rolls when we sat down and the waitress just mumbled under her breath “wow”. I live for this. For people to see how incredible my kids are. To realize how beautiful the family life is and how miraculous these growing children are. :)

  10. I have a heart for big families, I’ve always wanted one. But my husband is of a slightly different mindset. I respect his opinion and submit to his authority but still would love to have/adopt about 2 or 3 more kids :)

    I always make sure I say something positive to the mom dragging 7 kids through the grocery store because so often they get negative comments.
    .-= Cheryl@SomewhatCrunchy´s last blog ..Weekly Wrap-Up =-.

  11. How I needed to read #2! I had three kids in three years–my oldest just turned four, and my youngest turns 1 tomorrow. I constantly feel like I am the worst mother in the world, and I discovered this temper that I never knew existed! I always said I wanted four kids, but after this year, I’ve doubted that I could do it. Thanks for offering your perspective!

  12. These are great reasons. I’m at the point where I have two little ones and I’m feeling overwhelmed and outnumbered. But we want a large family so this is an encouraging post to know that the vision I have for what our family can become is a reality for you! I’m most looking forward to playing games and helping hands :)
    .-= Amber @ Because Babies Grow Up´s last blog ..Top Ten Reasons I Love Birthdays =-.

  13. I get the “You sure have your hands full!” ALL THE STINKING TIME! I’ve gotten to the point that when they say that, I look down at my hands and remark, “No, I’ve got room for at least two more!!”

    My current favorite is: “Are you planning on having anymore?” (Which I think is incredibly rude, btw, because what business is it of theirs?!?) to which I reply, “If I’m lucky!” Which is usually followed by “Well, good luck with that, I had (one/two) and I couldn’t handle those!” I am trying to work my nerve up to say some kind of snarky remark back, but I know I won’t!

    I actually had one man follow me through Wal-Mart with his wife, and when I finally stopped, he SHOUTED ,”That’s not a family, it’s a TRIBE!” UGH. I couldn’t believe the rudeness!!

    Anyway, to the point, I LOVE your list, Amy, and I agree with every single point! (Although the majority of mine are really too small to make light work- I know the day is coming!)
    .-= Desi´s last blog .."The Monsoon of 2010" =-.

  14. I loved your post today. I am the mama of 5 children. We have loads of fun. It is amazing the comments that people make.

    Blessings
    Honey

  15. I absolutely love this post!! We’re currently a “childless” couple… not for lack of trying though! :) We’re in the process of adoption a baby boy and I’ve always dreamt of having a large family. The reasons you listed are so true! 2 of my closest friends have 9 children each and their families are 2 of the happiest and most fun that I know! Thanks for sharing this! :)

    * I have a giveaway at my blog today if you are interested in entering! :)

  16. Thank you, Amy! I am one of those women who thinks to myself, I can’t handle to two I’ve got … although my heart longs for more of God’s blessings. This issue is one I continue to struggle with because neither my husband nor I are naturally schedulers, planners, have everything running like a well-oiled machine-type people. So with the second child came an overwhelming wind of chaos, which we are still battling. I want to believe we could handle more children, but at the moment it is really questionable for me. Thank you for the encouragement to look beyond the potty-training years!

    • Jennifer,
      I have to be honest…I’m not a great planner or scheduler either. However, running a large household kind of throws you into such things. I would have told you years ago that I was the last person who should have a large family, yet that is what God wanted for our family. If He calls you to it, He’ll equip you for it. :)

    • Jennifer, I also just want to encourage you. As Amy mentioned, it gets easier, they aren’t little forever. If you train your kids early and often they will turn out to be amazing little helpers and the life lessons you are teaching them is invaluable. I am an only child and always knew that I wanted more than one, but 5 (or more) was the farthest from my mind. I was a 2 or 3 and I’d be done kind of girl. The joy, love, friendship that builds among siblings is amazing and beautiful to watch. God will give you everything you need to be a wonderful mother to more when needed. I am expecting twins and question how I am going to do it, but I know God will give me everything I need mentally, physically, and financially at the perfect time and not before.

  17. I’ve just got to say – I am really loving your blog. :-)

    I only have four children, and I am known at the grocery store as “the head covered lady with all of those kids.” Mouths drop even more, when they see that my kids are well behaved, LOL.

    I get the “you’ve got your hands full,” and “you must be very busy” just about every single time we go somewhere. I just smile, and tell them that my children are a blessing, and good helpers around the house.

  18. Oh, I sometimes get the “you know what causes all of those kid’s right?” types of comments. I figure if they are going to be raunchy, so I’ll be raunchy back, and say “yes, we know what causes it. Why do you think we have so many children?” :-P

    • just awesome response – haha – we have 8 (13 and under)and haven’t had many rude comments, actually-except the ‘how many more are you going to have?’. I’ve actually had 2 people (yes, I remember THAT!-now what was I going to say?) tell me they were impressed how I ‘managed’ my children! HA! (I sure didn’t tell them about the ‘temper I didn’t know I had’!) For the most part, though, I do love being a mom – well, except for the laundry, still hate it – it’s a gala day when the 3 hampers are empty! Today’s one of them! tra-la-la-la-la

  19. I only have two little ones (ages 4 and 1) and people are CONSTANTLY saying, “You have your hands full!” I confess it is a little irritating when you have two well-behaved, happy children with you… but I think in my case people are just trying to acknowledge the children, and they don’t know what to say. (Much like I’m guilty of making the lame remark, “I bet he keeps you busy” when someone tells me they have a toddler at home.) The best response is, “They’re a lot of fun!” or something along those lines. It’s true that sometimes even two children can make your hands full, but I would love to have more!! :)

    • You know, I think most people mean well when they say you have your hands full (and that’s why I let it go because I could tell the woman who said it to me meant well). They can be a handful, but I wouldn’t have it any other way!

  20. There’s someone I’m friends with on Facebook who has 7 friends. She has things that say “Yes I have my hands full…joyfully. Yes, I’m glad it’s not you too” etc. So funny! A loving response to all the usual comments.

    My oldest (2) is sitting in my lap and saw your pictures. I pointed out the kids and the mommy. She waved at the screen and said “Hi!” She is 2 going on 16 though…ha. We get in the car now and she climbs in the driver’s seat and says “I drive car!”
    .-= Kate´s last blog ..Tropical Traditions Coconut Oil Review =-.

  21. Love your list!
    I was at the post office today, and a stranger did the counting of my kids. Then, she looked at the stroller, and said, questioningly, not meanly, “There’s another one in there?” I know she did not mean anything by it, in fact she was quite nice, but the question struck me as funny. I did NOT respond, “No, 3 kids that can walk aren’t enough. I’m in the habit of pushing an empty stroller around, just for the fun of it.” :)

  22. Two thumbs up for big families! I don’t have any kids but I’m an elementary school teacher and play a part in helping raise lots of kids. God willing we’ll be able to have our own kids and lots of them!

  23. Hi, I am a Mother of six kids ages 10 and under. Trust me I aways get the same remarks. I try to politely respond,” yes the Lord has blessed us.” I absolutely love my family. At the end of the day I sit looking at my family and enjoy the family God gave us. Thank you for this site. I have enjoyed laughs and have cried with stories that you have shared. God bless.

  24. I totally agree. When I had one I struggled; 2 and 3 and so on, now I am having #7. It is hard when they’re all under school age but it does get better.
    I think it’s hillarious when I go out only with my youngest two and get the, ‘you have your hands full’ comment, if only they new!
    It just goes to show how anti-children our society has become.
    We too have a lot of fun together and when my husband or I have had a bad day what a comfort our children are to us.
    I can rest assured that in our old age the sacrifices we make now will pay dividends thousands of times over.
    God bless all parents of large families and their children and may we continue to be a reminder to society that some people are still open to many children. Just as Jesus said, “Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.” (Matthew 19:14).

  25. Amen! We will be welcoming babies #4 & 5 this Spring. Even with 3 I already get the “your are crazy”, “don’t know how you do it”, and “don’t you know what causes that” comments. Drives me crazy but then I quickly remind myself that it is my life and not theirs. God has blessed us and I am not about to question his blessings.

  26. Ah, you’re almost there. I was raised eldest of 7. :) hehe

    We just had our 2nd 4 months ago. Everyone looks at our 2 year old daughter and 4 month old son and says we have the “perfect” family. I think we do! The perfect family right now! And when we add more, it’ll still be perfect :)

    I doubt we’ll have 7…in fact, I doubt we’ll have 5, but I never say never. That’s up to God to tell us when we get there :)

    Besides, it’s kinda fun making them (and we DO know how it’s done)…soooooooo..

  27. We have 5 ourselves…and we manage to fit 5 carseats (5-pt harnesses – all of them!) into our 7 passenger van.
    We got so many, “Wow, you sure have your hands full!” comments that our license plate now reads ‘HANZFUL’
    Kids ages…. 6, 5, 4, 3, 2… yup. (We are done though – I started late.)

    I am looking forward to the time when many hands make light work. It’s not quite there yet.

    However, my 24 mos. old now puts on her own boots, takes her coat off her own cubby hook, tosses it on the floor upside down and puts it on (over her head style) all by herself. DH was amazed when he announced for all the kids to go to the garage, get ready, and get in the van. My littlest one (she just turned two this month) did so! In fact, we had to keep badgering the others not to get distracted LOL!

  28. I love it! My husband and I are expecting our first child in July and I think I have moved him past the “just 3 kids” as we are now shooting for 5 as well! (I would actually take 12 if God gave them to me!)… so we’ll see.

    Here are some other things to add to your list!

    11) When my husband and I grow old and grey, the responsibility to take care of us won’t rely on just one child, but will make it easier to spread it out on 5 of them! My husband and I both come from parents who only had 2 children. Neither of my husband and I’s sibling want children (which makes us the sole provider of grandchildren) and our children will never get to have any cousin’s :( . Not only that, both of our siblings have moved far away and likely won’t help much when our parents grow old and grey, so the responsibility of taking care of 5 grandparents (my parent’s are divorced and one of them is remarried… which my step dad has no children!) will fall almost completely on my husband and I!!!! If both of our parents had even just a few more children than two, we wouldn’t likely be in this situation!

    12) I also took an economic geography class a few years ago and the reason why the population jumped so high, wasn’t because people were having more kids, it is because the average death rate expanded! Not only that, but if you take two people, husband and wife, and replace them with only one child, and then let’s say lots of people start doing this because they think the world is over populated, you have decreased a large majority of the population by 50% as only 1 person is replacing two. Japan and Russia actually have a day set aside for procreation, because they are set to have such a large decrease in their population with everyone only having one child!

    • Maria: Totally get where you’re coming from. DH and I are ONLY children. Thus, no 1st cousins or direct aunts/uncles for the kids. The rest of my family is mighty small as well (only two 1st cousins for me). In regards to #11, I like to joke that I reduced my odds of having a ‘bad apple’ LOL….but you never know… I knew a woman when I worked professionally. Several children in the family, and they FOUGHT over their elderly parent’s care (both who didn’t want the responsibility, who did, and in what way they wanted to be responsible – bossy vs. financially). It was a nightmare for them. It’s great to hear other’s ‘war’ stories though; I’m hoping I’ll be well prepared. (Yep, already did the will… you just never know what those crazy kids will fight over – the dust?!)

  29. We are expecting #9 (and have 4 in heaven besides) and we get the most incredible comments. People always count us when we are out and some are just rude. The best come back is quoting Psalm 127.

    We homebirth, so we have to buy our own cups. ;)

    Love your site!!

  30. I get “boy you have your hands full” every time I leave the house, it never fails. Someone once gave me a great response, “Better full than empty!” I soften it a little, but no one ever disagrees!

    We have four under four now, and aren’t done, and I look forward to every new adventure!

  31. I have three, with one on the way… We don’t get out much but when we do then we get similar comments.

    I don’t walk up to couple and ask them why they haven’t had children – that would b rude! I just don’t see why it isn’t just as rude to ask me why I have as many as I do. I have very strong personal beliefs that I know aren’t shared by everyone about the ‘pill’ being an abortificant, yet I don’t go around telling people that each woman who takes it, my thoughts and opinions on it. I try to be understanding although I struggle sometimes.

    Great list :-)

  32. I am 27 years old, married with a child of my own, and I STILL the comments and rude remarks when people find out I am #3 in a family with 14 kids. I have actually told a few strangers if they were so interested in knowing why my parents had so many children to ask them theirselves. It usually stops the rude comments. I really enjoy talking with people who are actually interested in my point of view on large families since I came from one, however I don’t love when people say “how many are you going to have?”, “are you going to try and out do your parents?”, “why aren’t you pregnant, your little girl just turned three!”. Those comments get a firm “mind your own business” answer. Haha! I enjoyed growing up in a large family for the most part, it had a few draw backs, but I can imagine it any different.

  33. I have 5 wonderful kids ages 10 and under. I am so blessed to have them and it’s so much fun. I wouldn’t trade my life for anything!

    Thank you for your post. I shared it on facebook and have already gotten several “likes” and repost!

  34. I just loved this~! <3

    We had our 5th baby 2 months ago, and I can tell such a difference in people when we go out…versus having just 4 children. I guess it's our family size…? But we actually attract attention going places. I find that very odd! Also, I have experienced all those same comments, save a few. People really can be so nosy, can't they?

    Your blog here is grand! I'm enjoying reading through posts. The one about your daughter Emily had be bawling my eyes out. I just am so sorry for what you have been through. I pray for continued peace + joy in your life~!

  35. The way you opened this post made me smile so much that I figured I would stop lurking and comment.

    There are only 13 months between our first and second, who is now just 3months old. The week before I was due we went to a big mall in the city for a distraction for me. We had just gotten baby 1 in the stroller when a couple walked by us and the guy says “guess we know what they do in their free time”. I was so offended. I complained to my husband about the insensitive nosey strangers who felt compelled to comment on my family. He smiles, not having heard the original comment, and says “he’s just jealous”, I wanted to scream too.

    Now when I go out with both my boys its rare not to be told ‘you have your hands full’ with just two babies. I have taken to saying, “Yes I do, full of good things”. I have found that it helps me to put my children in a more appropriate light. I often feel flustered and worn out after a shopping trip with two so small boys, its so easy to think that yes I do have my hands full and see someone else feels sorry for me. Answering nosey commentary with ‘full of good things’ reminds me that my babies are gifts from God, He timed their births, created their little personalities, and He is able to give me the grace I need to make it through till they can talk etc.
    ‘Full of good things’ is also handy to silence the follow up comments, I used to get ‘wait till their teenagers’ etc, now I usually get a surprised Oh… I think its good for people to realize that there are men and women who value children, and it will be good for my children to know that I value them, no matter how many bunk beds we have to buy.

    • I just wanted to let you know that my kids are about 16 months apart and I frequently get comments about if they are twins and why we had them so close together (I always joke that I was still loopy from being up all night when I got pregnant with the second, although she was very much tried for). I have to say it was rough when they were both little. Having to carry two was a pain at first. But, honestly, I wouldn’t want it any other way. They are 3.5 and almost 5 now and they are the best of friends. My daughter is a bit of a tomboy since she wants to be like her big brother. I don’t ever worry about them being lonely or scared, because they both stick up for each other and comfort each other. I wish we could have had more before my husband got cancer, but I feel very blessed with the 2 we have!

  36. I have 5 children and LOVE it! They’re all amazing and thankfully doing well. Teenagers even….. not the horror story most make them out to be! They’re responsible and I am blessed to watch them turning into the young adults that they are. My husband didn’t even particularly like kids in the beginning but I have ALWAYS wanted a large family. God is AMAZING! We had a girl, I got pregnant when she was 4 months old and wasn’t expecting to or even planning to. We began to get excited (my husband was telling all of his friends…) 2 months later we miscarried. That was pretty hard to take. After that we said we would have another. Had a son 18 months to the day after our daughter was born. Then AGAIN COMPLETELY unexpectedly, I became pregnant when that child was only 4 months old (apparantly you’re extremely fertile during this time?). So we have 2 little boys 13 months apart. After he was born and we had all the love from all of these precious babies…. we BOTH agreed to have as many as God will bless us with! So my husband to was on a different page… But the Lord has His ways. I always wanted a “large” family but in my mind that was 4 or 5. Now I have 5 and I think… Not large yet. :)There is A LOT of love in our home! So hands full? YES. Hearts full. YES!

  37. I love this post and all the comments on it. I’m only seventeen, but God has given me a heart for children and He has showed me about how much of a blessing children are. I pray that God will give me a big family one day, and I hope to be able to comment on forums like this and talk about how great my children are. I am just amazed at the fact that people look on large families with disdain and will tell you that they feel you have too many children, which is unfair because nobody has told them how many children to have. But God bless you all, and may God give you the strength to love and take care of all your sweet blessings! :)

  38. I, also, love this list :) We have two children (with one on the way) and I was asked the other day, “Are all these children yours?” All? There are TWO. My literal response was, “Why, yes, ALL TWO of these children are mine, thanks.”

    When I told my husband this he shook his head and wondered what people will say when we have 5 or 6!

    My other favorite (NOT!) was when we announced this pregnancy, and most people (family included, uggg) responded with, “Going for a boy, huh?” And now that we found out we are having a boy it’s, “You’re done after this one, right? You’ve got your boy.” Makes me SO angry, I almost wish we didn’t know! It seems to baffle people that we aren’t particular when it comes to gender.

    I got a lot of “comments” when we announced #3. My aunt even asked, “So, you’re really going to have a #3?” (Like I could take it back now or something…) My responce? “Oh, Auntie Liz, if I have my way, I’ll have my own soccer team…maybe two ;)”

    • I got a lot of, “You’re having another?!” with #3, but I already had my boy and girl, so I was really breaking the rules! ;) There will come a point when people believe you to be certifiably insane and just begin to assume you are pregnant all the time. It’s a nice change of pace! lol

      • My husband had announced that we were finding out the gender at work, and they said, “Wait..she’s pregnant again?!” And then they told him, “You know what, why don’t you just tell us when she’s NOT pregnant.” To which my husband inquired as to why everyone seemed to think I was ALWAYS pregnant when his co-worker had twice as many children as we do. And ours are all from the same parents!

  39. I am 16, and I am #5 out of 6 kids and I love it! I honestly I do not feel like we are that big of a family, I feel like we are a regular sized family. I want to have a big family when I am older!(bigger than 6). I not sure if I will adopt, or not. For the entire boy-girl thing, I just want at least one of each, just to see the difference.

  40. I have 7 boys (My oldest will be 14 in 2 months & has severe ADHD!, 12, 10 w/ADHD, 8, 6, 3- just diagnosed with autism, 19 months) 1 girl who will be 5 in April, 1 angel daughter in Heaven (miscarried at 14 weeks 7 years ago) and a baby (they are thinking boy) due this May 15th!! We have our hands full for sure… AND WE LOVE IT!! I wanted to tell you thank you for posting this! I just happened to stumble upon your site tonight (through The Homeschool Classroom) as I was looking through the FB posts. We’re a large family that struggles financially during these hard times, and we often are ‘looked down upon’ because of it. I know that God is in control and will take care of the situation. This is our first year of homeschooling as well. 7th, 6th, 4th, 2nd, kinder and pre-k. It’s been crazy, but I have enjoy most of the moments. ;-) I love being with my children every day. They are God’s gifts to US, my husband and I… not some stranger. My husband and I realized that God has intended for US to raise them, train them and teach them. So, we took the massive plunge last fall and we’re all still alive. :) Your webpage has given me so much hope for our future. So, thank you. :) God bless!!!!!

  41. I remember when having a big normal is was the norm. Dr Phil said the other dayy the world is only made for a family of 4. I guess our family of 8 is a problem. I love meeting big families. I am pround to be the mama of 6 boys.

    • I have to agree w/ Dr. Phil on this…most everything from restaurants to forms you have to fill out assumes you have 2 children (and they are usually a boy and a girl ;) ) I absolutely love not being the norm.

  42. Never heard “You’ve got your hands full” – Love it. Cute post. I have five lovely blessings of my own and they are a lot of fun! I am always amused by the people that have to count my kids two or three times….if you can’t count to five the first time, maybe you have bigger problems than you think I have! :) God bless.

  43. I recently found your site and have enjoyed exploring it. We have three daughters so far, ages 4, 2 and 9 months. I get the “wow! Your hands are full” comment all the time. I usually smile and reply with, “better full than empty”. Loved this post. Thank you.

  44. I only have TWO so far and I get “You have your hands full!” all the time! (Girl – age 2 and boy – age 9 months) And “Oh, you have the perfect little family, a girl and a boy, now you can stop.” I still feel like one or two are missing though. I love this site, very encouraging. Thank you for sharing your life. :)

  45. I started to cry when I read this article. My husband and I have a girl, 6 and a boy 2, but we still want more. I do feel irresponsible feeling like I want more children, especially with our family telling us that we have enough and a boy and girl is all we need. My husband always says that it doesn’t matter how many we have, everything will work out and there will never be a time when our kids are not loved or provided for. Thank you ssssooooo much for writing this article. I guess I need to listen to my husband more often. LOL.

    • No one decides your family size except you, your husband, and God! Don’t listen to them. I heard the “Oh, you have a boy and a girl, now you’re done” LOTS of times. I have three now and #4 on the way. No, we were not done! (Are not done!) There’s a lot of pressure to have “exactly” 2 children, preferably a boy and a girl. But that’s those other peoples’ problem, not yours. :) And you know…you only regret the kids you didn’t have, not the ones you did!

      • I urge you to read the book Family Driven Faith by Voddie Baucham. He talks a lot about developing a family atmosphere where God is the center, and he tackles the topics of how the philosophy our American culture has, “a boy for me, a girl for you, thank the Lord now we’re through!” is just not a biblical one. He puts it all into perspective. You can get the book on Amazon for around $10. It is one of those books that has totally influenced our family in ways that we will forever cherish!

        • We have an 11 month old, #2 due in December and would love to have a large family! We have a girl and #2 is a boy, so we are already getting the ‘oh, two of each how perfect!’ or ‘now you can quit’ or ‘it’s best to have a pair’ comments which drive me CRAZY!! Firstly I do NOT think those comments are Biblical, secondly I grew up in a ‘perfect’ girl/boy 5 years spaced family and hated it, so lonely and booooring. I just try to smile politely and not look to annoyed when we get those stupid comments.

  46. We only have 2, but are planning at LEAST 2 more. Of course all of this is in God’s hands, but I have always felt like having a large family is important. We practice communal living. We have a house and next door is a large piece of proerty that has my parents house, behind that is my sister and in front is my cousin and her hubby and daughter (used to be my grandma’s house) – all on one property. It has made so many things more … awesome to have family close by. People think we live on a compound :) but it truly is awesome. (my inlaws are even being swayed and they are even looking into property next to or behind ours.) As far as the environment, we want to have 4 (that covers replacing me, my hubby and my sister and aunt (who don’t/can’t have kids). There goes the carbon footprint argument for those that have an opinion (not anyone on here – out there!)
    But on the other hand, we have very level headed kids (age 18 mos and 3 yrs) and they are so smart (3 year old knows Pi to 9 digits, doing 2nd grade math) and LOVE God and Jesus (we just finished Princess with a Purpose Prep School) so why would I deprive the world of more awesome children?? ;)
    In all seriousness, great article and I think, no matter how many kids you have, the most important job you have (besides teaching them to love God) is to be an intentional parent. You have kids for a reason; you teach them for a reason; you make X decision for a reason. You don’t just let the world happen to you. And I think that is fabulous.

  47. Love it! My husband and I are young in our marriage still but God has blessed us with 3 lovely children and we are praying that He chooses to give us more. Thank you for this encouragement! I have always thought it would be easier the more you tack on because then the older kids can help :) My 4 year old daughter is already such a little mommy and helps with her siblings as much as she can or I will let her. I pray that God will bless her with a large family too because I know she has such a nurturing kind heart.

  48. I love this article. Ive read it quite a few times. I have posted the link also. I have 7 wonderful blessings. My oldest a boy is 14 then 2 girls 12 and 9 then 4 boys 7, 5, 2 and 13 weeks. I get rude comments all the time. My own family has threatened to disown me and have said very vulgar things to me. I believe its up to us and God to decide. I enjoy reading your blogs Amy. They are very uplifting and help me through some difficult times. Thank you so much!

  49. Just wanted to let you know you made me smile. We didn’t have a large family, just 5 kids, and they have all grown up now, but it was fun and interesting and in a place and time when I keep hearing people want to give up on having children it is wonderful to hear of someone else who loves being a mother. Keep loving the children God gives you. They can love you back, cars, houses, fame and fortune can’t.

  50. I’m single and don’t have any children but I love large families.
    I love the quote from the original Yours Mine & Ours with Henry Fonda and Lucile Ball. One of Henry Fonda quotes in the movie is “I suppose having 20 children is taking it a bit far, but who would we give up?”
    It bothers me to no end when I hear Christians making negative comments about large families. When they do that they are dimminishing the value of each and every child. The Bible calls them blessings and society thinks of them as burdens.

  51. I just had my 3rd baby, my second boy. Oliver is his name:)
    It has been a crazy adjustment, but I just keep thinking “I want more”
    I just keep looking at other big families and think “that would be awesome”
    I had a thyroid issue with this last pregnancy and doctor said I should get it
    removed….but then it may not be possible to have more babies. Really not sure
    What to do, is this a sign to be happy with the 3 I have and be done???

  52. ughh i get sooo sick of hearing all the same comments! my husband and I have been married since December of 2009. Straight outta high school! We now have two boys and one girl! Our oldest will be 3 in November, our middle child is 19 months, and our youngest is 5 months!! I love love love having them close!! We want a large family as well but we want to be able to handle it financially before we have more than 4. :)

  53. I’m a big family mama with only 2 kids under 3 so far. Living with four generations under one roof means things are never boring here, either. I forgot where I heard it, but someone called their posse of children a spawn-terage. Priceless!

  54. Thank you for your article. I was an only child, my husband 1 of 6. We’ve got two girls, aged 4 and 1.5, and another girl due in 10weeks. I’m very nervous about being a mother of three, but I’ve been encouraged by your article. I was also on the fence about getting permanent birth control because I just couldn’t see the point of having more than three. This article is definitely food for thought. Again, thanks for your words!

  55. My husband and I got married in 2003. Despite our decision to not use birth control, it wasn’t until 2007 that we conceived our first child. Those years in-between were heart-breaking. My arms would literally ache when I saw babies. I stood on mountaintops and railed my frustrations at the stars.

    Finally, two days after Christmas 2007, our oldest daughter was born. The date is doubly important because it was also exactly one year after I accepted that God’s plan for us may not include children (At the time, our finances made adoption an unrealistic goal for us.). I stopped praying for a baby and prayed for a joy-filled life despite not having one. I prayed for strength to fully depend upon the wisdom of the journey He had marked out for me.

    I believe that our (and especially my) faith was rewarded with the dream we’d desired. I truly believe that our children would not be here today if I had not stopped fighting.

    Since then we’ve had two more daughters (To my husband’s small dismay. The poor man is out-numbered!). When people ask us if we’re going to have any more, I always tell them that’s it’s not ultimately up to us. When they ask about birth control, I say we don’t use it and they look at me like I have five heads (or maybe just one, big, empty one)!

    They never seem to understand- after desiring a child for so many years, why would I now say “no” to one more? ;)

  56. We are blessed with 10 and now have 11 grandchildren…it just keeps getting better!!! We have homeschooled all of them all the way through high school – it is challenging but worth all the effort.

  57. I love your liat! I have three little ones (ages 4, 3, and 1) and am pregnant with #4. I was just saying today that having 3 is easier than when I had just 2! I am hoping this holds true, lol.

  58. Love #5 and #6. We have 5 children ranging from 5 to 4 months, so my favorite thing is the looks when we are walking in a line. It goes from the oh so cute to what in the world as we walk by. Even though some days are tough and I’m still working on how to manage it all, I wouldn’t trade it for anything :)

  59. Thank you for this. I am a mother of five, so far, and came from a family of 12 children. We always have fun! I love big families and it is nice to find other people that do too.

  60. Forgive me if someone already asked and you answered. BUT I have to ask… concerning #2…. how do you make it? I have 2 kids, 4.5 and 2.5 and they are driving me nuts. Stubborn, disobedient, embarrassing, whiny and dramatic. Maybe also because we don’t make much money (just under 30k) and they don’t have a slew of toys or activities or the Y. I love them and enjoy being with them during the few seconds a day when they are quiet or obedient, yet they make me mad, frustrated and sometimes say things that hurt my feelings…bedtime is horrible and all this besides the diapers, the making meals, baths, etc. that come with having kids. How do you get your head wrapped around the ‘they grow up and help you’ idea AND how to be convinced enough to want to have more. My husband wants at least 1 more (maybe 2), but we don’t see our income going up unless the Lord just blesses. I feel so trapped with desiring to be done with kids, seeing this as the Lord’s will for my life and even to have more, and of course dealing with my husband needs but lack of financial support that I see fit to have more. (we have the bare necessities and I don’t see us owning a house, let alone helping our kids go to college)–I stay home because we feel that’s the Lord’s will if at all possible.

    • Rose,
      It is hard. You have to find creative ways to do things and you have to do your very best to keep some semblance of order. These babies are blessings. I had to see them as blessings before I really felt like I could enjoy them. Psalm 127 was huge for me (thus the reason for the name of this blog!). I’ll be praying for you today.

  61. I love your article! I only had 3 children but i was the 2nd oldest in a family of 10 children. I just wanted to encourage you and let you know my parents are still living and we all live within 3 miles of each other. They have 26 grandchildren and 15 great grandchildren, and we have a grand time together. So yes children are a amazing blessing and inheritance from the Lord. God bless you Mary Jo
    P.S. I am a grandmother of 8 and loving it!

  62. Loved this list!!! #6 is my favorite! I have a 15 passenger van and 7 kids! I wish I could film the looks on people’s faces every time we go somewhere! And the fear that people have when they see that many kids and then the shock when they realize how quiet and well behaved they are compared to the mom with the 2 kids that are wild and out of control! Love your blog! Just saw it posted on FB and can’t wait to read more!!!

    • And just had to add…”Are they all yours?” And when I reply yes, people think it is ok to ask if I gave birth to all of them. One of these days, I just might respond something that isn’t very nice! I don’t understand where our society has gotten to that people think it is ok to be so personal and weird.

  63. Good list. These are the things that make mornings like THIS morning (naps couldn’t happen soon enough) worth every bit of the chaos. My six little blessings – 5 home-baked and one adopted, from age 12-2 – are what keep me going.
    I would add a few to the list:

    *They teach frugality and resourcefulness. When you have 6 kids and a SAHM, it’s always tight. Gardening, backyard chickens, re-purposing, hand-me-down co-ops, bulk-buying, canning, etc. If a child wants the pretty sparkly notebook, or the Iron Man lunch box, that’s fine, but they pay the difference between the basic and the “upgrade” themselves.

    *Loneliness is a thing of the past. As a teenager, I used to pity the people who would sit alone at a restaurant table. Now I get it. Being alone isn’t lonely. It’s peace and quiet!

    *You learn more than you ever thought possible. Because I was blessed with the children I have been, I have learned more about reptiles, marine invertebrates, bipolar disorder, aspergers syndrome, albinism, attachment processes, language development, glue sutures, orthodontics, sprains, Chinese culture, bike repair, etc. than I ever would have without them. Also, because “the teacher always learns more than the student”, and parents are perpetually teachers, the learning never stops!

    *Efficiency. I used to take 2 1/2 hrs to get ready in the morning. NOT any more! :)

    *Talking out loud doesn’t mean talking to yourself. You always look like you’re talking “to” someone, even if you’re just thinking out loud. I have been known to talk to my pregnant belly when no one else was with me.

    and so forth. :) It could keep going.

  64. I hear you! I grew up in a family of 6 kids and loved it.
    My husband and I wanted a lot and now it seems nature is against us after one.
    I DREAD having just one. I am just praying we can afford adoption for more than 3 kids to make sure we have a fun big family.

  65. I also have five fantastic blessing, hard work but great fun. We always get comments, mostly well meaning . I suppose it’s good that society recognises how hard rising a family is. Both sets of my grandparents had five children although back then neither of my grandmothers worked outside the home and my grandfathers were home by tea time as well as weekends. I have to work part time and my husband full time just to keep them all fed. Time seems to fly by wont be long before I have loads of grandchildren myself. Thats the bit Im really looking foward to.

  66. We’re expecting #5 (3 girls and 1 boy so far). When asked if they prefer a brother or sister, my girls readily respond that they hope it’s a girl so that we can adopt a boy. They are all so delightful to me, and I completely agree about some of the advantages of having more. People tell me, “You must have your hands full,” and I honestly feel like it’s really not so bad compared to people I know who have one unruly, spoiled child who needs to be entertained all the time. My kids entertain each other and care for each other- I can take a nap, or a shower, or whatever, and usually everyone is happy and safe when I come back. I love it.

  67. I love your blog. Another great thing about big families (I grew up with only one brother and then only had 3 children of my own) is that they learn how to parent. They learn what is age appropriate and aren’t so distressed about the little things. My husband (who was the oldest of 5) understood that my kids were completely normal at different stages because he had watched his siblings grow up. And then, his youngest siblings were there watching all their nieces and nephews grow up. I didn’t know how to parent at all. It was harder for me to enjoy raising a family not knowing how normal the different stages are and how quickly they pass.
    Keep up the great work. I have passed your blog along to my kids, hoping they’ll learn from your wisdom.

  68. Enjoyed your list! We have 7 children. All were homeschooled over a 21 year span. The oldest and youngest are 20 years apart. As you might gather we heard our share of comments also. The most shocking was when I was carrying my fifth was, “Are you considering abortion?” But there were also encouraging comments. Hearing our children’s comments about the “homeschooling years” is so much fun and of course it was worth it all. We would take nothing for the blessing of our 7 blessings.

  69. I don’t mind slightly larger than average fmaily. However, I disagree with generalizing about people with one or two kids. I am one of two kids and I never needed entertaining. We had good manners.Kids form larger family can seem like an only child if the parents favor them. I am tired of the myths about only kids being somehow dysfunctional and abnormal. I also feel like women who keep having kids are trying to a fill a a void in their lives, men too. Then they try to justify the number of kids by knocking smaller families down. That goes against what the Bible teaches.People had a bunch of kids years ago because it was an economic necessity. use to want a bunch of kids too until reality set in.