Does your home feel chaotic and stressful? Are you looking for a way to make your home a peaceful haven for your entire family? I’ve written an ebook/workbook that will walk you step-by-step through the process of bring peace and beauty to your home. LEARN MORE HERE!
This week, we’ve been blessed by our family, we’ve created a haven, and we’ve brought peace to our evenings.
Now it is time to put the children to bed and enjoy some time as a couple!
For many parents, bedtime is a struggle and anything but peaceful. But by bringing our day to a peaceful close as we talked about yesterday, we find that bedtime isn’t nearly the fight it used to be.
I’ve written before about our bedtime routine and tips for good nights, but the most important part of putting children to bed is a gentle voice and a firm resolve (sound familiar? It’s part of what this blog is all about!)
Practically, that means listening to your children, but knowing when enough is enough. Sometimes children do manipulate and sometimes they have genuine concerns. No need to raise your voice or get your dander up if you are actively parenting until all the little ones are snoozing. {Read my post on Good Nights for tons of nighttime routine ideas!}
Once you have those little ones snug in their beds, it’s time to spend a peaceful evening with your husband.
I’m going to be honest with you…I’m not always good at focusing on my husband at night. So often, I am worn down from the day’s activities and just want to check out. But, my husband is an amazing man and deserves more from me. He deserves my focused attention.
Here are a few ideas for pushing past the exhaustion of the day and finding peace in those evening hours with your beloved.
*Make eye contact. Your husband deserves your fingers to stop typing, your eyes to stop reading and your mind focused on him.
*Create couple traditions. On chilly nights, Ty and I sit by the fire. Sometimes he reads Scripture to me or I read to him from the current book I’m reading. He receives an almost nightly back scratch, and he’s always quick to make me a special cup of coffee with my favorite creamer and a spot of whip cream. We watch movies together and sometimes just sit and talk. The lights are still down low and the music is still playing and we are alone {as alone as you can be with 6 children!} in a quiet house.
*Go to bed together. Obviously, there are exceptions to this, but try very hard to go to bed at the same time. And don’t always bring the laptop to bed either!
*I learned a wonderful lesson from Teri Lynne Underwood – Rather than saying No, ask for a few minutes. Give yourself some time to decompress and refresh. You’ll make his night!
Purchase the ebook!
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Mrs. B says
Thank you for posting this. I struggle so with this, just peace in the home. I have 8 children ages from 14 on down. I so want a happy home. But I currently have a surly teenager (Not what I thought I would have) and it is effecting the rest of the children.
I will be reading more here.
In HIS Keeping,
Mrs.B
Kate @ Modern Alternative Mama says
It’s always funny when I hear about bedtime struggles — it’s one issue we’ve never had. We take the children up around 8 each night, get them ready, snuggle them individually, and down they go. There is no fussing or crying or fighting, except on the very rare night that they are sick or overtired. Even the baby has cooperated and adopted this general routine almost from birth! We make bedtime fun (we often sing a song or play a game of patty cake amidst cuddles), we make sure they have water in their rooms, and are tucked in with their special blankets. It’s a fun time as a family. And then we have 2 hours before we go to bed to work or play, usually both. That’s where my problem starts — I work too much in the evenings because the children keep me too busy during the day! I need to hire a mother’s helper a couple mornings a week so I can work then and spend more time with my husband!
Amy says
What a blessing because that certainly is not the norm for many families! And evenings w/ my husband is the bigger struggle of the two for me as well. 😉
Courtney says
I wanted to say that I loved the purity of how you shared about giving to your husband physically – I think we avoid that topic so often because of how it has been mishandled in our culture, and we forget to encourage eachother on how to use that gift in a way that God intended. Thanks for the pure way you encouraged me and my sisters to use that blessing in a godly way 🙂
Amy says
Thank you, Courtney. It is a tenuous topic, but so very important.
Teri Lynne Underwood says
Great post, Amy! {And thanks for the mention.}
Amy says
You are certainly welcome, Teri Lynne – made a big impact on me 😉
Blessed5X says
A struggle here too! 5 children (aged 4mo up to 11 yrs… 2 are homeschooled, 2 are potty training, 1 is nursing!) I am often so drained by the time they are all in bed! And hubby works 4 to 5 nights a week & when he is home, HE is also totally drained! Thanks for the reminder to focus on this! 🙂
oliviaandwill says
I really like your post…I loved it…Thanks for sharing with us…
Lindsey says
You have received the Versatile Blogger award. For more information, please visit http://www.babiesbooksandsigns.com/2011/11/blog-award.html.
Thanks for having an awesome blog!