How I Became the Perfect Everything

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How I became the perfect everything (because no method in the world is going to get it right) | RaisingArrows.netNot too long ago, I began to have the distinct feeling that I was wasting time. Every conference I went to, every conversation I had, every song I listened to, every Bible passage I read seemed to point me to the fact that I was seriously wasting time.

I didn’t mean to do it. In fact, I wasn’t even aware of it. But, when the same words continued to be spoken into my life, I knew I needed to take a hard look at what those words were saying.

The specific words weren’t, “You are wasting time, Amy.”  They were things like:

“You don’t need to be Jesus to your kids. You need them to need Jesus.” ~Angie Smith

“I realized it had to be Jesus + Nothing.” ~Kendra Fletcher

“but just as we have been approved by God to be entrusted with the gospel, so we speak, not to please man, but to please God who tests our hearts.”
1 Thessalonians 2:4

“You gave me life worth dying for, but between the altar and the door, I bought the lies that promised more; All my deeds and my good name are just dirty rags that tear and strain to cover all my guilty stains that You already washed away.”
All You’ve Ever Wanted by Casting Crowns

To you, those words may not sound anything like, “You are wasting time.” But to me, that is exactly what they were saying. They were telling me that I have been focused for far too long on the details, always missing the big picture. They were telling me that in the process of managing a household, homeschooling a ton of kids, being a wife, and writing a blog I wasn’t allowing myself to be raw in front of anyone, so no one could see (including myself) that I needed Christ. These words were telling me that I was working and working and working for something that had already been taken care of.

It was almost as if I was on a hamster wheel – wasting time going in circles. Over and over again, I was rolling through the same stuff, working myself into a frenzy, but never getting anywhere.

And never acknowledging that Jesus had already taken care of it all.

We read blogs, talk to friends, ask questions on Facebook trying to figure out how to be the perfect parent, perfect wife, perfect homeschooler.  We hash and rehash conversations, searching for answers that only seem to be temporary.  We live a discouraged, beaten-down life.  Yet, we weren’t called to that sort of life!  We were called to victory, we were called to abundance, we were called to joy overflowing.

Where did we go wrong?

We tried to be everything.

Let me tell you something…

I talk a good talk. My bio photo even says “an abundant life”, but I wasn’t acknowledging that abundance in life has nothing to do with how quickly I get my housework done or how calm the kids are or how well I homeschool. In fact, I bought the lie that those things really mattered to God. That my sacrifices somehow made me holy before Him.

The truth is, He can’t even see my filthy rags.

The truth is, He wants my heart, not my works.

I was wasting time trying to be everything…trying to get it all right.

Friends, if you are doing the same thing I was, I want to encourage you to lay that burden down right now.  It’s not yours.  Jesus didn’t ask you to be somebody, He asked you to be HIS.

How I Became the Perfect Everything (stop wasting time!) | RaisingArrows.netHe wants your every day, every moment.  He covers the mess ups, the gaps, the craziness.  And He gives you JOY!

What your children need is a mom totally sold out to Christ.  They need a mom who isn’t wasting time being perfect, but who perseveres through it all because she knows where her strength comes from and she knows she can’t do it without Jesus.

You know how I became the perfect everything?
I gave up.

I can’t mess this up if my heart is focused on Jesus.  I can’t mess this up if I ask the Lord with a contrite heart for daily provisions in my parenting, homeschool, and homemaking.  I can’t mess this up if I am loving Him and pouring that full heart into my children’s lives, my husband’s life, and beyond.

I’m not going to get this all right.  There is no formula or method that will make any of us the perfect parent, homeschooler, mom, wife, friend.  We are wasting time if we think there is and we go chasing after everything that tells us so.

You can be the perfect everything not because of ANYTHING YOU DO, but because JESUS ALREADY IS.  Every step you make is covered.  Just walk it with your heart mind and soul focused on Him.

19 Comments on How I Became the Perfect Everything

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19 thoughts on “How I Became the Perfect Everything

  1. thank you!! I try to be all and do everything and feel guilty when I don’t live up to my own standards. i know God says i am enough and i really appreciate him using you to remind me of that today. thank you again!!

  2. Funny, but I read this and think that at least you were *trying*. Maybe you lost a little bit of focus along the way, but you found your way back. I totally see your point and agree, but sometimes I feel like I need to pick up the pace, because I could certainly waste time that way too! Great post, Amy. :)

    • It’s good to “try”, but apart from Christ it’s meaningless and a total waste of time. All the trying in the world won’t bring about the perfection we truly seek. I have a friend who calls “the end of ourselves.” That made a lot of sense to me.

  3. Can I tell you how refreshing it is to read this!?! I love blogs – particularly yours 😉 – and books and pintrests. In reading books on how to organize and articles on different issues and seeing pictures on pintrest, I end up feeling like I can never measure up to this or that… complete and utter failure. Seriosuly the worlds worst organizer, have the biggest temper and lets not even talk about gluttony! 😉 It wasnt until recently I discovered…I **don’t** measure up…in anything!

    Thank you for being “raw” and sharing all of this! I am so grateful!
    May God pour His grace and blessings over you and your family today!

    Thank you Amy for being “raw”! I am so appreciative of your tender honesty! We are all sinners – we all need Him!

    Thank you and may God pour His grace and blessing over you today!
    Tami :)

    • Sorry for all of the thank yous. I am typing from my phone and my daughter brought me a bouquet of dandelions 😉 lol – some how I think I hit enter – oh my – hope you all can laugh at this long winded explanation. ….I am now! 😉

  4. The movie Mom’s Night Out addresses this as well, and every time I get to that part of the movie, I can’t help but cry. I’m so busy trying to do what I believe needs to be done or what I think is right, that I forget about letting him do his great work in me and those around me.

    Love your honesty, sweet friend. God is doing great things in your life and the lives of those around you.

  5. Oh, Amy, this is my testimony, too. So many years spent trying harder and doing more. God stripped all of my efforts when He walked us through the fire with our kiddos, and I found myself hungry for Him + nothing. Funny thing is, I’ve had more spiritual growth in the last four years of *not* trying than I did all of those years I was so desperately working to add to what Jesus had already accomplished at Calvary.

    You are loved!


    • So much of what you said that day hit home. I couldn’t tell you then, but *I* was that women screaming in the hospital – not literally, but for the people in the ER the day Emily died, I was that women. I often wonder what they might have thought that day and what testimony we left for them. I’ve gone through so many ups and downs, but in the last few years, I have felt so spiritually dry as I waded through all the things I had been doing over the years. It was no one’s fault but my own. I like rules. I like methods. I like knowing outcomes. And fear has ruled my world, especially since losing Em, because I didn’t actually hold the rule book and the outcomes weren’t as I had planned. It was time to let go. Thank you for speaking what the Lord had you to speak. ((HUGS))

  6. You hit it right on the head- awesome post! I catch myself in this dilemma quite often, being my A type personality and all(!) and I have to stop and remind myself that I don’t have to do it all, get it all done, or work my way into heaven. Thank you for putting it so well.

  7. Wow, this was a timely post for me. Thanks so much for sharing your thoughts, keeping it real and bringing the focus back to Christ! Amy

  8. Hi Amy, I was blessed by this post and would love to share it with some ladies at a parenting workshop I’m teaching next weekend. May I read it and/or print copies for them? Thanks, Wendy