When eight people live together in a house, it often gets messy very quickly! Our home is especially susceptible to this on the weekends. It could be because we are busier and out of our routine or it could be because we don’t want to take the time to pick up after ourselves. Regardless of why, we sometimes need to have a “Reclaim the House” session, where we all work together as quickly as possible to get the house back under control.
Tonight, while we were “reclaiming”, I was hand washing all of the dishes that wouldn’t fit into the dishwasher, while my 6 year old daughter helped to dry them. She is normally my slow worker, the one who HATES anything that even resembles a chore. She usually finds a reason to delay working by saying she’s hungry right as soon as I announce that we need to get busy. This time was different though. This time, she was excited, because she was encouraged to work right alongside of mommy. I was excited because I had the privilege of encouraging her to be a harder worker by complementing her work. She totally ate it up! It was a way that I could fill her love tank and help her to enjoy being a hard worker all while bringing us closer.
That had me thinking about a recent quote that I read. I wish I could find it now, but it went something like this: ”The more quality time you spend with your children while they’re young, the more they’ll want to be around you when they grow up”. It’s all about spending quality time.
Do you spend quality time with your children? I know I’m guilty of spending too much time in front of the computer while they’re off doing something else. I’m also guilty of sending them away to do a chore, while I’m off doing another chore. How much more valuable that time would be if we spent it working together. We could talk about anything important to them, laugh and make it into a fun game. They will remember their mother as someone who they like to be around. You will be someone who makes them feel special. They will grow up wanting to be around you! I understand that it’s not always possible to be right next to your children when you have them assigned to a job, but I do think that we can make a more conscious effort to do so.
In addition to cleaning together, here are some ideas of how we can spend more time with our children:
- Play a game .
- Read a book
- Do a puzzle
- Take them out for a meal one on one
- Go out for dessert
- Set aside so much time per day to talk (especially important with older children)
- Do a craft
- Cook dinner (rotate in a child to help you each day)
- Volunteer together outside of your home
- Let one child at a time go to the store with you
Talk about their bond. Since losing Emily, we talk to our girls a lot about how they are the only sisters they have and how important it is that they foster that relationship. We don’t do it in a preachy way, just a matter-of-fact way. We talk about how perhaps one day one of the brothers will work with another brother. It might never happen, and we certainly don’t expect it, but there is no harm in building that bond with our words.
