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As I sat in that Country Club dining room I felt so out of place.  Surrounding me were men and women working their way up a corporate ladder I had never stepped foot on.  I’m just a mom.  What in the world am I doing here?

You can find me today at The Better Mom talking about feeling out of place as a stay at home mom in a crowd of working moms.

I have avoided this post like the plague.

People email {a lot} asking how I’m doing, when I’ll update, and what I think of the program this far into it.

And I avoid.

Why?

Because I didn’t want to have to tell you I had fallen off the wagon!

What happened?

To begin with…LIFE.  I could use my pregnancy and subsequent miscarriage to totally justify all of this in your eyes, but that’s not fair because I fell off long before I found out I was pregnant.

The biggest reason was the amount of brain energy and time it took to do all the exercises that are involved as the Tupler Technique progresses.  I felt burned out.  And my “all or nothing” mentality told me that if I couldn’t get ALL the exercises in during the day, then I just shouldn’t do ANY of the exercises.  Not smart.

So, here I am with a humbling update.

My progress?  Not backward, but definitely not forward.

What do I think of the technique this far into it?  I am still a wholehearted advocate, but I have also learned something from a dear reader whom I conversed with via email a few months back.  She encouraged me to tweak rather than give up.  (Disclosure: What I am about to say is NOT endorsed by Julie Tupler or the Tupler Technique in any way, shape, or form.)

Tweak #1:  My braces are looking pretty ratty and I’m not fond of the new design (haven’t tried it though).  Wearing the brace at night always gave me a horrendous back ache and I wasn’t doing a good job of holding my stomach muscles in when I wore the brace, so I am only using the brace when I do the exercises.  Otherwise, I wear a support garment (like you find at your local discount store).

Tweak #2:  I am focusing solely on the first 4 weeks worth of exercises.  I had wonderful results back in 2007 from just doing those first 4 weeks.  For now, I am going to stay there because they feel doable to me.

Tweak #3:  Not really a tweak, but one that I wasn’t nearly as good at while wearing the brace.  Remembering to hold in my stomach!  And that brings me to an epiphany and a warning…

I don’t remember the exact date and time when I stopped holding my stomach in, but I would say it happened sometime shortly after I got married.

I wanted to be pregnant.

I wanted to be pregnant so bad, I quit worrying about holding in a non-pregnant stomach.

And then when I truly was pregnant, I definitely didn’t hold in my stomach.

And then I was pregnant all the time, so what was the sense in holding my stomach in.

And then I ended up with a diastasis recti so severe, I ALWAYS looked pregnant.

And I was mortified.

I wish someone had told me.

So, now I’m telling you…HOLD IN YOUR STOMACH!

It’s not just for debutantes or single women.  It’s not just for vanity’s sake.  It’s not even because your mom said so.

It’s because DR isn’t something you want to have or want to get worse.  I don’t have the medical repercussions many woman experience (bowel issues, hernias, etc), but I do know my pregnancies would be easier if my muscles were not separated so far.

So, there you have it…I fell off the wagon and I’m back on.

I’m going to go back and update all the old posts with new information.  I’ll send out new updates here and there.  And I’ll continue to offer hope and encouragement from someone who understands!

After I wrote a post saying I was giving up soda and a friend who reads my blog caught me with a soda in hand, I said I would never write a post like that again!  So, this post isn’t quite like that one in that I’m not saying I’m giving it up forever and I’m not without purpose this time, but I am doing without soda for a time and here’s why…

1.  I was reading through Large Family Logistics and even though I’ve heard it a hundred times, something about Kim saying how much better she felt after giving up soda made me think perhaps I should work toward that because…

2.  I’ve noticed how tired I am and how I use soda to combat that.  I also know that the soda is robbing me of the vitamins and minerals that I need in order to stop feeling tired!

3.  My husband is an inspiration!  He hasn’t had a single drop of soda in 20 years…yes, TWENTY years!

4.  I don’t drink enough water.  I never have.  But, I need to.  I always figured since I wasn’t thirsty I didn’t need it.  I was wrong.

5.  I’ve given myself a goal.  No soda until November 1.

6.  I’ve given myself an incentive.  For every soda I dearly want and I do without, I am putting aside $2 to donate somewhere (I haven’t decided where yet).  I’ve already racked up $10!  I’m curious to see how much money I was spending on soda…and frankly, a little scared!

So, this is sort of an experiment.  I want to see how much I was spending.  I want to see how much better I feel.  I’m even curious to see if I might happen to drop some of these stubborn pounds simply by giving up my soda habit…

until November 1, that is.

And who knows, perhaps someday I’ll be able to say,

“Kids, your dad hasn’t had a soda in forty years and I haven’t had one in twenty.”