OK, not really.
He seriously doesn’t care.
So, why do I?
I could spout something about how I’m filling landfills and how I’m putting chemicals next to his sensitive skin, but it won’t change the fact that right now I cannot hack cloth diapering.
Now, don’t get me wrong…I LOVE cloth diapering. There is something terribly satisfying about putting cloth next to your baby’s skin. And cloth you’ve made…well, that’s even better! I am looking forward to returning to cloth diapering, but I refuse to be a martyr to something that is simply a preference.
It is a “good thing”, but it does not own me.
But, “good things” are like that, aren’t they? They are so good that we would gladly stand on soapboxes for them. They are so good that we would gladly sacrifice other “lesser” things in order to continue with the good things. We feel so strongly about them that we have a hard time imagining our life without them.
And then life throws a curve ball…
And the “good thing” starts to have consequences we can’t manage.
For me, it was the ick factor (yes, there IS an ick factor with cloth diapering. You can read how I usually deal with it HERE.) and the fact that even my normal, everyday laundry wasn’t getting done, let alone the cloth diaper laundry.
The good thing became the difficult thing. No, I don’t ditch everything that is difficult, but I do have a few guiding principles that help me make decisions when good things start to cause me grief.
1) What does the Bible say about it?
2) Will it matter in 10 years?
3) Is the situation a forever situation?
4) If not, what will the short term effects be? On me? On the children? On my husband?
5) If it is, what will the long term effects be? (same people as before)
6) Is this a pride issue?
Ooooo! Did you catch that last one???
All too often good things get wrapped up into who we are. We are defined by the things we are passionate about. When they go south or become more than we can bear (even if just for a time), we find ourselves scrambling to make sure we’re still who we once were. We are afraid to tell people for fear they will either point fingers or think less of us. We don’t want to admit defeat or failure, even when that’s not really what it is.
We are proud of the things that define us. Losing those things hits us where we live.
I’ve had some major realizations in the pride department lately. Things that I felt defined me were falling away at a rapid rate and I found myself distraught. Recently, I sat crying as I read an email pertaining to one of the things being stripped from me thinking, “Why is this bothering me so much? It shouldn’t matter to me as much as it does.”
That’s when I realized it was pride that was causing me the most grief.
So, as for cloth diapering (among other things that have to go by the wayside-either temporarily or permanently) I have to see it for what it is. It isn’t who I am. I don’t suddenly change without it. I don’t have to do XYZ to be me.
And admitting it doesn’t make me weak…it makes me real.
Realizing and humbly accepting my limitations Works For Me! To read more WFMW tips & tidbits, follow the link!