Lo, children are an heritage of the LORD: and the fruit of the womb is his reward. As arrows are in the hand of a mighty man; so are children of the youth. Happy is the man that hath his quiver full of them: they shall not be ashamed, but they shall speak with the enemies in the gate.
We are what some people call QUIVERFULL. The term is used to describe any family who leaves their childbearing completely in the Lord’s hands. This means no birth control, no sterilization, and no Natural Family Planning; no prevention of any kind.
But, what about PROMOTION? Does God want us to try to conceive? And, let me take it one step further…does He want us to use interventive methods to cause us to conceive?
These are all questions that the Quiverfull-minded family has to consider because there may come a time when the babies don’t just “automatically” come every year or so. You may find yourself overwhelmed by the Baby-A-Year Club, only to find yourself frustrated when you don’t conceive within your “normal” time frame.
However, this is where the rubber meets the road in the quiverfull walk. If you believe the Lord controls when you conceive, then you HAVE to believe the converse: the Lord controls when you DON’T conceive. In fact, I would suggest that for the quiverfull woman, having a baby every year is not nearly so difficult as going through a period of time when the babies aren’t coming at all.
Do I believe a woman should NEVER seek methods to promote conceiving? NO. I think the Lord expects us to keep our bodies in working order, but we must be careful that we are not trying to usurp the Lord’s authority. What are our motives? Remember, the Lord’s plans are not always (dare I say, RARELY) immediately evident to us. So, we really must seek all interventive methods with much prayer and diligent introspection of our hearts.
Another issue that will more than likely rear its ugly head at some point during our childbearing years is something I call The Conception Competition. Even something as pure and good as being quiverfull can turn sour in our sinful human hands. We all know what this Race to Conceive looks like and feels like. We want to “keep up with the Duggers.” We don’t want another quiverfull family to “beat us” We find ourselves thinking, “Whatever will I do if ______ (name of another quiverfull mama) gets pregnant before I do?” Jealousy is never far from the surface.
It is perfectly natural for a woman to desire children, but when bearing children becomes our sole focus, the essence of truly being quiverfull is lost. The verse reads, “Happy is the man that hath HIS quiver full of them.” (emphasis mine) We are not all going to have the same quiver. The Bible clearly warns us against comparing ourselves amongst ourselves (2 Cor 10:12). This only leads to jealousy and sinful behaviors. If we are totally trusting the Lord with our family size, then we MUST be content with our family size at any given point in time.
We cannot spend our time being jealous of others or feeling as though we are less-than-quiverfull because we “only” have X-number of children. We must wholeheartedly enjoy OUR particular quiver. We cannot assume that since we have been having a baby a year that that trend will continue. God does not “guarantee” your fertility.
And having babies IS NOT a status symbol. Children are not “points” you “collect”, they are blessings you receive from the Lord. We must appreciate each and every one for the individuality of their particular blessing. Showing off will only taint your quiverfull testimony.
Lastly, let your babies be babies. Enjoy every second you have with each of your little blessings. Should the Lord bless again, wonderful! Should He not, you have not spent so much time focusing on a future baby, that you have neglected the babies you do have.
It all comes down to TRUST. Do you trust the Lord to be the author of YOUR perfect plan? THAT is the essence of being quiverfull. So, please enjoy YOUR quiverfull!